My expressions throughout the years
CHAPTER 19 LINK TO OTHER PAGES
How dreadful life is, men look on things as if they come naturally, not realizing that our discomforts are because of our sins. For why should I suffer discomfort when the Lord has taken pleasure on me?
Why O Lord does Thou plague me with pain when my soul loves Thee as a Father, and I have kept Thy word? For Thy commandments are my delight, and yet I know O Lord I have not been obedient but rather light-hearted and foolish.
For while men speak of all such discomforts as natural things, as if they simply come upon us, even I was dulled with that poison. I sinned O Lord in not being awake, instead of speaking what is true, in ignorance I acted along with them in their ignorance.
I brought hurt to myself, and brought pain on me in
my ignorance, but this pain has no cause, there is no cause for this pain.
I have sinned O Lord, how stupid of me to fall with men, talking with
them in the attitude that all such is natural.
Why did I not rather speak the truth that it was because of my sins,
and by ignorance that such pain is on me?
For O how majestic Thou art O Lord, no shepherd can stand before Thee, and
no man is clean. Yet Thou did
form me O Lord for Thy glory. Perfect
then Thyself in me and let me live and be glad in Thy mercy, and remove the
pain O Lord. Teach me not to be indifferent, take away my indiscretions for they are
many. There is but one way open
to me to call on Thy mercy. Be
merciful O Lord to me Thy creature, and cleanse me.
What am I O Lord? With all
the knowledge and understanding Thou has given me I am still foolish, still a
man. Even though I
understand what few understand I am a foolish because I am a man.
While Thou O Lord art high in Thy heaven, exalted and majestic, although
one might concede me wise yet I consider myself foolish.
And though men may say, " His understanding excels for he was
taught of God", yet what do I know.
Rec 2 (April 17-92).
Today is the Sabbath, the second day of Passover, and tomorrow the day
after the Sabbath, seven weeks, 50 days to the morning after the seventh, the
everlasting day of the Lord for which the Lord created me.
And as a token to the same He caused me to be born on that day.
I am tired and weak, nor do I know if I have a broken rib or a sprained
muscle, but the pain in my chest is still as painful as ever.
Physically I feel like a wreck, wore-out and old, too much work for too
long, too many years.
Mentally however the Lord grants me acute peace and vitality.
If now only my physical condition may not hamper it for the flesh rests
heavy on the mind, when I am weary in body I give up on my thoughts to rest.
O Lord would that I might come home, even now. But I have yet years to live, long, long years, like eternities, as they seem to me.
Rec 3 (April 19-92
the Gentiles call it).
This day is the morning after and in 50 days again the morning after, the
day of my birth, the feast of weeks, the eight-day, the day of promise.
My wife said this morning, "Happy easter".
And I said; "easter was 3 days ago, today is the morning after.
But who will understand?
My thoughts plague me how no-one is able to hear the things given me of
God, how I am so alone, and yet not really alone, but alone not having any
human with whom I can speak.
For behold, with whom can I speak of those
things that God has
given me to understand? Where is
understanding that I might have a conversation? And where or with whom can I speak of fundamentals?
What man or scientist has the knowledge to go into such things?
In all respects I feel myself lost in this world, in a world alien to me.
The Lord in giving me such understanding has made me strange in a world
where no such understanding resides.
4 (June 9-1992 )
Reason fails for lack of inspiration, and what is logic if not when the
facts present themselves. There
is no substitute for experience, and what is a word learned if not in
experience? The word alone does
not confirm a man as experience does to him.
This day I learned a lesson, the Lord impressed upon me with realization
and experiences a true lesson. For
what is it to know and to know? We
are too much involved in ourselves as if we possess the abilities, which
foremost are in the Lord, and we do not credit Him with these abilities, as we
When I write as I have written, the books and translations, then my
thoughts are sharp and thoughtful, then I realize and understand things, and
know exactly how to speak and see things clearly. But when I am with others I don't even know how to speak.
Then am I thoughtless, and afterwards I realize my fallacies and say to
myself. Why did you not think of
that, why did you not say this or that? What
is the matter with your reasoning and with your speech.
For you know it, you know it well, and yet you are like a fool not
knowing how to speak or reason.
This lesson came to mind, when we think to know do we then really know?
And when practice and experience makes perfect what is it that we have
perfected? The right attitudes or the wrong attitude?
For this is my meaning, whatsoever we are in all that is good - it is the
Lord within us, and to realize this, yes, to know it and know it well is
having come towards perfection.
For this is my meaning, whatsoever we are in all that is good - it is the
Lord within us, and to realize this, yes, to know it and know it well is
having come towards perfection.
The word alone then does not teach us - as to experience the same along
with it. And so the Lord not only
gives men His word to understand, but brings on him the experience so that the
word be well granulated in him.
One can learn many things yet is there no substitute for experience.
My reason is not my reason, nor my logic my logic, nor are the words of
my mouth my words, neither are my thoughts my thoughts, but all are the
What have I that is not the Lord's, and what are my good qualifications if
not the Lord's doing with me. Yet to realize this, and to realize it well are
still two things. For I know all these things, I knew them long ago, and yet my dear Leonard
how well in fact did you know them so I ask you?
For although you teach them to yourself and to others, how well in fact
do you know the word you knew so well?
For I know all these things, I knew them long ago, and yet my dear Leonard
how well in fact did you know them so I ask you?
For although you teach them to yourself and to others, how well in fact
do you know the word you knew so well?
For now take a good look at yourself; how are you about to rebuke many
people for not having proper reason and for not having the logic that is
logic, and reproaching them for not correlating, and for thoughtlessness.
And here Leonard you do the same, you are guilty of the same.
Yet I must reprove the people in that way. But this we must know well, that none of these
things in which I seem to excel or do excel are mine but the Lord's, and to
acknowledge them that is the point.
For although I acknowledge them with the pen and with my lips, does indeed
my heart also do so? For we grow much accustom to God's gifts granted us as if
the power were in us.
At first it is a little, and accustoming ourselves we take on more and
more - like as if we were good at reasoning, or as if reasoning were a quality
of ourselves, while in fact it is inspired, and thus not our own.
This therefore I must never forget that wisdom and knowledge whatsoever of
these are in me - are the Lord's. This
I must vividly recall so as not to accustom myself to these gifts as were it
For we slowly accustom ourselves to such things and allow the power of it
to grow over from God to ourselves. And thus the Lord reminds me of these
things in a practical way with due experience.
And so I came again this day to the realization that I am the instrument
in the hand of God. That in
myself I am nothing, but whatsoever I am I am in the grace of God.
And thus to give credit where credit is due and not just with heart and
lips but truly from the heart to the lips and with the soul that foremost is
pure within me as without blemish.
And thus to give credit where credit is due and not just with heart and
lips but truly from the heart to the lips and with the soul that foremost is
pure within me as without blemish.
As also the Lord said; "I speak not My word but as the Father gives
Me." And Paul, "Even if
we tell you differently than we have delivered - let it be accursed".
Meaning the word of God by us is good and true but our own is not.
Or, what is of God is truth.
So we come to realize that God is all things and all things within us,
that we are His handiwork now and forever, and that our very life and doing
are our word and our thought as His in us.
"The great city that I build".
So Nebuchadnez'zar said, and he became like a beast for he did not give
the honor where it was due. For
us then what better shall I be when I say, "The house that I built by
myself"? Since it is the
house that the Lord built by me.
And while thus I have made these outrageous stupid statements in the past
- how am I still alive for such abominable stupidity and thoughtlessness?
It is by the grace of God.
I am about to utilize reason logic with knowledge and insight by which to
reprove many, scolding them for the lack thereof. Let it then never be in me as if any of these qualification
are of me, or by my power, but that of myself I am just as they are, with the
qualification of God alone.
Rec 5 (6
If I cannot be delivered of the child within me - then why should I live?
O that I might pass out of the earth not ever again to hear the sound
of deceit and of violence.
I spoke saying; “Let there be an earthquake that destroys, one in whom
many thousands will perish - then perhaps at last these men might take it to
Yet, when shortly afterwards as I lay in my bed a quake struck and it
continued as I lay in my bed moved by the quake, I said, “O Lord they are
Thus as at times I seek for wrath, then again I plead with Him that they
are only men, for as terror strikes I am quick to ask for mercy.
Yet who among them acknowledges that it was the hand of God?
Rec 6 (7 -
12 – 92 )
Thou O Lord art magnificent, faithful, and compassionate.
I asked of Thee knowledge and understanding, even for a certain matter
to understand Thy work, and Thou did grant it me.
Yea even such greater things, which I had not realized, nor asked for.
Neither riches nor the goods
of this earth hold meaning for me, but Thy peace O Lord and Thy righteousness
is near to my heart.
Hear then you that are wise, for the Lord granted me understanding. He
enabled me to many things, and gave me insight so I might know what is good
for men, even a means to obtain unlimited energy.
Yet I am not tempted by their money, nor by their luxury, nor have I need
of their honor nor of their praise. My
heart did not in the least incline to their offer, nor will I accept their
bribe, for my heart is made in the Lord, and it stands for noble things, not
And so I have written a redress to their offer if they will accept my
price. For indeed it would be
criminal of me to withhold this marvelous treasure for the benefit of all men.
Let this than be a record, a testimony before hand that indeed I did
not withhold what men crave.
And having affixed a price if they are willing to pay that price I shall
not withhold it from them, for I will behold what is in the mind of men.
Let it then not only be known to them, but let the word be confirmed with
the deed that he who is noble stands for noble things, and that the sons of
God desire justice and equity above goods.
I desire justice from them as a price, justice to the poor and to the
needy, and if they will give me that, then I will give them the thing that the
Lord revealed to me.
Regarding the knowledge that was granted me, of that I said that I would
give it them without price. But
as for this thing, which they crave most, I will affix a price, but not a
price as they thought, or are wont to hear.
And thus O Lord my God I thank Thee for this kindness to Thy servant, and
the thing, which my heart has purposed with the sons of men.
May it be noble in Thy sight. Bless
then my intend O Lord and may it be blessed to the glory and the honor of Thy
Rec 7 (7 -
14 – 92 )
Fulfill Thy word O Lord, come speedily, and let not sworn secrets slip
from my mouth, but may these be put to shame that cause me hurt.
Repay them O Lord for the hurt done to me, let them fall backwards and
not find Thy secret.
Take vengeance O Lord for my sake, for all the years that they vexed my
spirit, let the wise be fools, and the diviners of men be as the blind.
When I reached forth to them they would not hear, if then they will reach
out to me, I will not hear, but I will lay a price on them.
I will say to them; pay me my price and you shall have."
For I know they will not pay me my price, since noble things do not
come of wicked hearts, even as wicked things do not come of a noble heart.
8 (July 16 – 92 )
The Lord has given me this innovation as a token to feel the weight of the
world upon me, for on me has He placed the world that knew Him not, pointing
out to me the guardianship of the world.
And now indeed I feel the weight of the world upon me learning to be
responsible for the whole number of them, the endless number of them.
Rec 9 (July 19 – 92)
O you proud boasters saying, "What comes on the righteous also comes
on all," - for the wicked are not tried as the righteous.
When the wicked and the righteous are cast in the furnace of adversity
only the righteous survive. For
all that is cast in the oven will burn except gold and silver which instead
will come through purified.
What real trial has taken hold of you O you of no faith?
When you say "I will believe," and the end comes and you are
not saved what is it to you? For
so you failed like the multitude, and who will call you to answer before them?
But take now the righteous
upon whom God has laid adversity, for whom
there is no way out, nor any rescue, for lest he put his trust in God he will
not be helped. Can therefore you
run to a cliff and know that at its edge your deliverance will come?
For this is his trial, the trial of the righteous.
Not adversity but his faith is his trust to keep peace in his heart while
war rages over him.
It are his
thoughts, to think no error while nothing correct is seen by his eyes, and to
speak no word amiss when his heart is sorely tried. For adversity is the trial of fools - but faith the trial of
the righteous. Take a marker and let it be a token.
Is my faith tried for the salvation of my soul? Do I concern myself for where in the end my soul shall rest?
This I know is in the house of the Lord.
What then is my trial? It
is my every day reliance that in all things the Lord is my Savior.
And now I am sorely tested, or as one might say, he sorely tests himself.
For now I have an innovation that in greatness affects all men the
whole world over, but I went forth saying; Behold, hear me, set forth a
criteria and pay a price, and it shall be yours.
Boast now O you vain persons that adversity and trial is on all, but make
it as the trial of the sons of the Lord - who for their failure would fail a
thousand times worse. For here
again while the fool in his adversity may die honorably in starvation, such is
impossible for the righteous since the Lord is their stay, and their trust,
and the food in their mouth.
While therefore adversity brings a fool to death it brings the righteous
to faith and trust. The righteous
cannot die from starvation since the Lord has said; "Trust on Me and I
will help you". Therefore if
his trust were to fail his death is a thousand starvation's.
Rec 10 (July 22-92)
How marvelous are Thy works O Lord, how faithful all Thy word, Thou has
shown Thy servant the promise of Thy word, Thou has not let him who delights
in Thee suffer want, but Thou does quickly turn Thy favor to him whom Thou
tries with adversity.
Again and again O Lord in great compassion Thou did mold my heart with
adversity, to try my soul, to purify my heart, to enrich my thought in the
goodness of Thy law.
From long ago Thou promised that Thou would never leave him nor forsake
him who put their trust in Thee. And
never O Lord has Thou forsaken me, but rather Thou did hasten Thyself to me,
to redeem me, to bring help to me in need.
My praise and my thanks is to Thee O Lord, my heart exults in Thy grace.
I love Thee O Lord, O how I love Thee, Thou art more to me than all the
kingdoms promised me, and more than the life which Thou has bestowed on me.
My soul loves Thee; I adore Thee O my Savior.
O what marvelous things Thou has done for me, how will I recount Thy
grace? I believed upon Thy word,
I heard Thy voice and was not rebellious, but Thy word was sweet to me. I have heard O Lord the word concerning Thy servant; I have
treasured the same with me Thy promise concerning me.
Thou made me for Thyself a great name, and honored Thy servant with Thee.
Thou has promised me a kingdom, a kingdom of many nations, of peoples
without number. Thou did say; "He shall be a noble cedar, a noble
prince, a king of peace".
accordingly Thou made me. And
Thou did reveal to me my luster in Israel.
What many great things Thou did for me O Lord, how magnificent Thy
wondrous work with me. Thou gave
me wisdom above many, and to understand Thy creation, to know fundamentals.
Thou did give me such secrets as men seek.
This now I have understood O Lord that it was in Thy favor to me, to Thy
servant for which reason Thou withheld such things from other men. The proud
did not discover it, nor did their wise comprehend what is within arms-length.
But Thou did close their eyes and blinded them for their pride.
See now O you men how much God has given to so many and they
understood, wherefore then did they not comprehend fundamentals?
Because the Lord withholds from the proud but gives to the humble.
With all this O Lord Thou wilt show that wisdom and knowledge is in Thee
alone, out of Thy hand. Thou did
close their eyes so they might not discover what was for Thy beloved ones,
which Thou gave also to me.
And with all this Thou showed me my place in Thy kingdom.
That I might be called a son of Thy Son, a token in the redemption of
man. Thy promise to me O Lord is
more than I can perceive.
Hear then you who in future years will read my words and consider my
deeds. This day before it goes
forth I testify that man is not likely to believe me what God has indeed given
me knowledge towards certain matters.
Yet because they would not believe me, and rejected me, so I determined to
withhold certain things from them, that as their pride and arrogance is vain,
so let them eat vanity.
Rec 11 (Aug 2-1992)
Am I jealously guarding a reed of knowledge? Why am I so adverse in giving while in so much I give so
freely? You should not have
rejected me O you people, nor should you have been silent at my calling.
When I called no-one answered, counsel had fled from you, you had not a
word to answer, and you lacked integrity as well as courtesy while you
concealed pride and boasted in my absence.
So you brought me to despise you, as were you no more than an illusion, a
dream without substance. And I
thought in my heart, this will not go unpunished; I will repay them for their
insults, and for their mockery I shall keep back.
Then let them fetch for themselves, or I will say; go and ask your wise
men that rejected me, who thought themselves so wise, let them teach you and
feed you with your desire.
Once I said; "I will withhold," - but you were not aware of that
which I withheld from you, nor would you have known what it was that I
withheld. But to a source of
energy you can relate.
I however was of a mind to be kind and forgiving, but now you have made me
indignant, now I will bring my word to fulfilling. I will no longer make an offer to this generation.
Thus I am reminding you of what you will not have, that which you
All the day long, day by day adversity faces me; it is as if the Lord my
Helper has left me. From all
sides by everyone I am robbed and beaten, no one cares,
even those of my father's house.
O how I despise this generation, how greatly this life is a hell to me,
though I plead for justice against those who freely rob me instead more
injustice and violence is done to me.
But though they live in ivory towers and bulge from the fat stolen from
the simple, yet they will perish. Nor
do I desire their goods, but this O Lord, that Thou wilt avenge the injustice
done to Thy servants, to those who trust in Thee.
Let Thy servants O Lord behold Thy vengeance upon those that make it their
pleasure to oppress everyone near and far, that rob the helpless, and grow fat
from gleaning the bones of the small.
Rec 13 (Nov 9 –1992)
Day by day my soul is rent, from all sides my enemies assail me to rob me
of the little left to my sustenance. Even
friends and brothers speak with deceit afflicting my soul with robbery.
O that my tongue could express my pain, it seems that all things I take to
hand fail to prosper as if the Lord has departed from me.
Yet I know the Lord is near and that all things are to my welfare.
Therefore along with confusion and pain my heart finds rest in the Lord
who will deliver me from my enemies.
I was hard pressed to take action, my heart was deeply affected, and I
tried to understand, to comprehend the will and the way of the Lord.
And I grew weary of trying to understand, nor was I able to, for the
Most High deals wonderful with the children of men, His way through the sea is
The wicked rob me of my living, and yet I am at ease and count not the
losses for the Lord is my help and my sustenance. If not in one way the Lord will sustain me in another.
Therefore I am at ease because my hope is on the Lord and I trust in
Never before has the Lord left me desolate, but He always revived my soul
with the sustenance of His hand, for He is faithful, and in His faithfulness I
hope and trust, and glory in His name.
Rec 14 (Dec 30 1992)
O for love and compassion. O
for mercy and judgment. Let this
be recorded in the tablets of heaven O Lord my God, that; I have no desire to
give my life for the many wicked among men.
Nor as Thou did point out to me - that my offering be for the removal
of their iniquity.
That for the cruel ones and the vile, which have sold their soul to the
devil to practice oppression and debauchery - that my life not be for them
that live to deceive and that practice so called Godliness for greed alone.
How O Lord should our blood with Thine suffice for a removal of their
guilt which cries out in the most cruel ways, of those whose deeds are not the
errors of men but the immorality of devils and of the sons of devils?
Who O Lord can forgive these most cruel ones for their unspeakable crimes,
for as their crimes are, so to atone for them there are no words to express.
I know O Lord what Thou require of me, I have heard Thy word and
understood Thy anointing upon me. Yea,
O Lord my God I have surely heard, and Thou did say for sins in ignorance.
Surely I have heard and understood.
Who then shall have regard for these inhumane? If not Thou O Lord wilt regard them surely their grief will
be everlasting and their souls not worth accounting.
I know not O Lord what Thou has in mind for these, other than that they
will surely receive their reward. But
this only I did question O Lord; what person would give his life for the likes
of them? I have only heard of
them and seen their deeds from afar and already my soul draws back from them.
Let this then be recorded in Thy tablets O Lord that Thy servant whom Thou
called with Thee has no pleasure nor desire in the likes of these.
As Thou wilt O Lord in Thy great wisdom, let Thy will be done.
Rec 15 (April 1993)
What are the multitudes of my thoughts, O how I strain myself to
understand the way of the Lord. How
long O Lord wilt Thy anger be? And
yet I am not being fair, for Thou has always helped Thy servant.
When I was in need and there was no help Thou did comfort me; Thou did
come to my rescue.
Thou art faithful O Lord and will not let those who hope on Thee fall.
Yet while I know Thy faithfulness and my heart is turned to Thee, why
then does my heart cry and am I confounded as a storm raging within me?
Day upon day, week upon week, month upon month Thou does visit me.
When I had nothing I was in need, and now that I have much still I am
in need. I am always in need of
Thee O Lord. Neither riches nor
poverty is to any avail, for when Thy hand is upon a man there is no escape.
O if I were persecuted for a word, if only my enemies stood against me for
my hope in Thee I would rejoice. But
this is most loathsome to me that for my daily needs I must contend, for I
despise the riches of men, I have no love of money, yet in these things I am
tried, to contend for what is most loathsome to me.
I would rather die O Lord Thou know it, and renounce all that is mine for
which I have labored - if only Thou would take me - and show me another way.
Thou did grant me to acquire much, and yet of what good is any of it
when it is withheld, when it cannot serve me?
Now I realize the irony of it all, how vain men are.
Thy mercy alone O Lord sustains a man, and by Thy compassion we are
build. Wait not too long O Lord to redeem me, but deliver me from my needs as
Thou has done so many times in the past.
Remember Thy faithfulness O Lord and come to me speedily.
Let not the wicked rejoice over me.
O were it only me, if only the rod was on me.
But with me are those who trusted me, who labored with me, who do not
understand the rod upon me, nor that it is for my welfare that I am wounded
with Thy rod of adversity.
Rec 16 (April 1993)
Who is like unto The Lord forgiving sins? Faithful is the Lord our God, who will not forsake them whose
hope is on Him, who in times of need call on Him.
He who trusts in the Lord with patience and endurance shall find Him, and
he who relies on Him shall not be put to shame. When he is tried the Lord will acknowledge him, when he is
found upright in heart and his soul un-wavering, keeping his eyes fixed on the
But woe to him who goes two ways, for how shall he say that the Lord is
his God? Will he look to the Lord
and also to men, to the Son of God and also in himself? He that is double minded shall find the Lord faithful in this
that he shall not be helped.
What is the fast if not - to be single-minded? Set your affections on Him, and your reliance on the Son of
God, cry to Him and He will appear for you.
Was it not said; "Having put them through many trials"?
This then was in order to receive them unto Himself.
Why do you worry O man and is your heart turbulent?
You cannot change one hour from the next; the Lord made the hours and
you to pass through them. The birds of the air cannot take their flight without the
will of the Lord, why then are you so anxious for what is of no value?
The steps of a man are of the Lord, and His children, all of them are
under His care. I have seen
poverty and plenty, and whether one has much or little he cannot escape the
yoke that the Lord has put before him.
In times of plenty I suffered want, and in times of need I gained riches.
Why then is it that the Lord afflicts a man?
So he may learn to rely upon Him, to trust in Him explicitly to acquire
faith, the faith that saves, that brings to redemption.
Rec 17 (April 1993)
I went to work with the insane. I
said "these are of the house of insanity, with them I labor for my needs."
The Lord has cut off from me my means to support in the midst of plenty
my barns were emptied. How long O
Lord will Thy anger be against me to add dismay to adversity, my life is but a
I look for Thy coming, with patience I wait for Thy word to sustain me.
Stroke after stroke brings me to my knees, so often I cried and Thou
did answer me. As often as I cried Thy help did sustain me, but now in the
midst of plenty I am cut down.
Do not say I have sufficient when you are rich O man, for it is in God's
hand that a man is sustained. Were
it not for the hope in my God my soul would have despaired.
Had it not been for my God, for my trust in Him I would have lost my
Rec 18 (April 1993)
My hope is in Thee O Lord. My
soul waits for Thee, for Thy compassion, for the judgment of Thy hand.
My enemies vex me, the sons of perdition try my soul grievously, but I
wait for Thee. O how hard the day
is to me, I am compelled to grieve for my mother and for my children.
O that I could put my grief into words, for so very long I have been
alone, the earth is filled with churches and yet I cannot go to them since in
none of them is a congregation of the Lord.
They are all temples of the devil; they are the dead worshipping the
dead, the blind following the blind.
The day is near; the Lord will show them how foolish indeed they were.
I have not been to a congregation for so long because there are none.
Nor in all these years have my eyes seen those next to me to love the
Lord, or to keep His commandment.
O how dreadful that they all have gone after idols leaving me alone among
them, as a fool among the many. But
I know the Lord, and His word is my love, He will acknowledge me before them
as one chosen of Him.
How is it that I have written so much, placed into words a marvelous
teaching while it remains hidden, and my way is cut off from before me?
The Lord has shut me up in the palm of His hand; He chastens me for my
sins done in ignorance, by His rod I am cleansed, in His mercy I am made into
Be patient my soul, endure O my heart, wait for the Lord, He will seat you
upon your pedestal. When I look
at others my problem seems small and insignificant, while then they fight for
life so am I, while they fight for what perishes, I for what is enduring.
They fight for what they do not understand, I for what I do know.
They are allowed to fail since it is in the honor of themselves, a
failing honor. I cannot fail for
the name of the Lord is upon me, and therefore I cannot fail but must reach
the crown to wear it.
Rec 19 (April 1993)
Some are quick to call the Lord their friend and to bring Him down to
their level. But for me how shall
I compare to Him? For He “is”
God while I am man. He is my Lord
and my God, my Redeemer, His name is excellent.
How then shall I be compared to Him as a friend?
He gave me a royal seating, great among the people, He however is Lord and
God, He is only and incomparable. Give
honor due to the Lord, worship Him as He is inconceivable and incomparable,
great and very majestic knowing ourselves that we are but dust and
Rec 20 (May 1993)
The name of the Lord is holy, and who will defile it?
From all sides I am beaten upon, my honor is cast down, my labor in
vain; I labor to my own hurt. My heart meditates on the misfortunes that overcame me.
I nearly said in my heart "I am ruined," I am a laughingstock
for my enemies; with malice they pursue me though I have done them no wrong.
Instead I did them favor after favor, but they repaid me with malice.
The hand of the Lord has brought me down, and more and more I wonder what
man really is, and how great the Lord is.
I re-evaluate the nature of man “what” and “who” he is, and
what his purpose is for being, and how very mighty the Lord is, so greatly
above all that He has made.
As for the words that I have spoken and the words written, these are not
my words, how shall I a worm speak with such boldness, me a mere shadow fasten
anything with words?
Yet Thou art my God O Lord, when Thy indignation touches me I come to
nothing, for what is a man before Thee that he should have a word or a sound?
I am distressed O Lord, Thy hand rest heavy on me, let me a little peace O
Lord, revive me in Thy kindness, bring again joy to my heart with Thy grace,
for Thou only are worthy to be trusted, and in Thee is my hope.
Rec 21 (June 1993)
The children of the Lord through all ages are as jewels His precious
possession of man. O how fair Thy
jewels O Lord, Thy grace evident to man.
Hear O Lord my plea and reward them for their doings, let them not go free
because they loved evil and the lie was their delight.
My heart yearns for the Lord, for His goodness, for the abundance of His
love to comfort me. As I look
upon the days they are filled with evil and distress.
O why has Thou made Thyself an adversary against me O Lord?
Adversity meets me daily, yea year after year I am robbed of my labor, my
wages burn holes in the pockets of them that rob me. They think that Thou does not see, they do not fear Thee, but
my eyes are upon Thee for justice.
Repay them according to their violence O Lord and vindicate Thy servant,
Hide my sins from Thee and return to me in goodness. Thy word only is truth O
Lord, when the time has come Thou wilt take me by the hand.
I speak but no one listens, when I reach out to them with compassion they
call me mad, they do not answer me at my plea. Thus I also rejected them, and though it seems as if even Thou
has rejected me and does not know me, yet my hope is on Thee and Thou wilt
fulfill Thy word spoken.
In that day Thou wilt open my mouth and I will speak.
In that day Thy Spirit will rouse me and I will go forth in the
strength of Thy name. Then shall
my enemies be confounded and my speech be heard, and afterwards Thou wilt give
them into my hand.
My soul awaits Thee O Lord till, as Thou brought adversity on me Thou wilt
bring prosperity to me - Thy word in my mouth. For it was good that I was afflicted that I might know the
Rec 23 (July 1993 Ref: 30 mil refri/art. A tidbit for a tidbit.)
O how these people are liars and thieves, they do not deal with reality.
50 to 80 a year for electricity, whom do they think they are kidding?
And while they say to now have a 25% gain, why if such a thing was so
simple did they not do so many years ago?
But their words are lies and their motives greed, and so is the now 30 mil
stolen from the consumer. For
again, are not the consumers penalized for saving? So it is that greed collect more and more stolen goods.
Again I cry to Thee O Lord, let the nations know war, let destruction take
them away. Behold O Lord the
great pride and wickedness of this people, of all peoples, of Israel as well
as of Gentiles. Come O Lord and
execute Thy wrath on them that sin in secret and in the open.
Why should He love them that make a mockery of life, that dwell in the
earth and deny His kindness? This
I pray of Thee O Lord, let their lot be extermination - that few may remain in
the earth. Humble the pride of
man to the full extend, for they are exceedingly proud and wicked.
They that eat kosher are as such that eat rats tails, food of
strangulation, idol worship, they have no knowledge. What is there to save in the world? There are but few worthy to remain, let the few remain.
I cry with Thy servants of old O Lord, slay the wicked O Lord that peace
may reign, destroy man from the earth that she may breathe again in
I have done a mighty deed in Thy name, I have done a great thing; I have rejected the whole multitude that Thou has given me. I have renounced the whole number of them - because, when I called they did not answer, and though I spoke to them they did not listen, therefore have I sold them into subjection.
The day will come that they would rather have me for a prince unto them. But I will subjugate them to one whom they would rather not be subject, because they paid me with silence, therefore was my soul turned from them.
Rec 25 (Jan 1994)
My heart cries to the
Lord by day and by night. He will not cut me off from His people, for I know His
name. And His statutes are ever
before me. When there was guilt on
me I did not deny it. For the just
judge themselves first,
Though it was in
ignorance, before the people I pronounced my guilt. But they looked on me as a fool.
And cast upon me the guilt of others in addition to my own. O Lord with
Thee is righteousness, with Thee alone is justice.
Upon Thee alone I cast all my cares.
My judgment is with Thee, Thou wilt save me. Rescue me from the wicked. Reward my enemies with their own desires Cast on them the works of their hands. For they know no bounds in doing evil. Delighting in their wickedness.
Rec 26 (Feb 3-94)
Is it not enough that
the judges are corrupt taking bribes and enforcing extortion with injustice that
even now the clerks as well are incompetent not knowing how to read?
O how dreadful are this people, how blind the children of man and that I should have my dwelling among them.
Rec 27 (New years day 1994 MK.)
How sad it is with this people, like children that
know not their right hand from their left.
They call it easter, yet have no idea of what easter is?
They know not that they are celebrating their
forebear's idol of fertility while they call and pride themselves as Christians.
How then O you foolish do you drag Christ and His cross into this pagan
These are blind actually believing that Christ died
on the last Friday of the month of March as if it were Passover.
This is more than ignorance. They
have a Bible mind you, millions of copies, and in each of them it reads that He
was crucified on Passover day, the 15th of April, how can they be so blind, so
This is beyond understanding how such a mass of
people can be so blind. I give up
on this people, I can not fathom the degree of their ignorance, for it are not
only the people - but their leaders and teachers are equally ignorant and blind.
In times passed the pagans must have celebrated the
first of the year taken from the Jews, since all came from Noah who kept the
first of the year on MK as the head of April.
Those then who had turned away from the faith of Noah and of Abraham,
added fertility as a new birth to the first of the year, accordingly they
invented their idol that now is called easter.
then the people of this generation had understanding, they could gather from
this so called easter that it reflects upon April, as on the first of the year
in their ancestral books rather than the Roman perversion of the kind.
like as it has been with the pagans and their idols, - they never did accept
Christ Jesus but only in name, nor did they ever relinquish their idols, but
simply for the facade added the name of Christ to their idols.
so it has come about that Christ’s death on the cross has been dragged back by
a few weeks - as if it were the contents of the first of the year - the pagan
celebration of the fertility idol. The
whole idea is totally illogical, a twisted mess, an absurd corruption of pagan
ideals mixed with the memories of the Lord.
even the Jews are corrupted by these pagans, for even among them have I heard
the same ignorance, even they do not know on what day Christ died. On Passover
yes so they assume, that is on good Friday, and that - on the end of March?
O how ignorant!
calendar for this year 1994, looks the same for the pagan calendar as it
concerns the month of April. While
then the first and fifteenth appear on a Friday, the pagans are nonetheless two
days out of time, since on their second, a Saturday, is actually a Thursday, the
Rec 28 (April 10-94)
Man has no conception of all that he is guilty of - in sins reckoned to him, He does not see his oppression as evil, nor his ignorance as sins. The engineers that designed and decided upon the diamond lane on freeways, are less than animals in their neglect of human rights and understanding, favoring a few and taking away the right of the many.
is oppression, it is illegal and immoral, and in direct violation of their own
laws and constitution. How then do
they commit such evils? Because no
one cares for the law, nor do they regard the people.
I however will not forget their incompetence, nor will the Lord.
Their laws read how a person is innocent until proven guilty. But by their courts as well as by the people in their whole it is practiced the other way around. Therefore you blind and you hypocrites, you are to be exterminated from the face of the earth, and not ever again attain unto freedom.
Rec 29 (4-12-94)
I look at what goes on, and behold the many ill-judgments of the many regarding
so many things - I feel touched, for O how I am enabled to teach the people, to
give them hope comfort and learning. But
it is in vain for they will not hear me.
name of the Lord is not in their conversation, nor do they cast their cares upon
Him, instead they look to themselves, and to their leaders, to an idol hope and
yes there is much to be said about this, for indeed so they will indeed in the
day to come look to their princes for help and comfort.
For since they denied God, and would not include Him in their speech, so
He will deal with them likewise. How
shall I become known as a king of peace if the leaders of this day procure
The world must become ripe for destruction so that evil may be rooted out and peace and justice reign of the Lord. For He is the one and only Author of peace and of justice, to Him alone that glory belongs.
Let me therefore be silent
that He may be glorified, and wills He glorify me so let Him speak His word by
me, that I may glory in Him, in Him alone.
Rec 30 (4-12-94)
vainly you looked for Adolph Eichman to execute him for crimes against humanity.
For if indeed you were bend on seeing such justice done, even such as
killed a dozen men, why not also go after a multitude of others, like for
example the admiral of the US Navy who for his pre-justice against the English
ignored their information, for which hundreds if not thousands of sailors lost
their lives, he was in fact their murderer.
how many are like him? Of the
people and the government of the USA there were those guilty in being
accessories to the killing of the million of Jews since they wished it so in
punishment now shall not be lacking, for as the Lord said of me, "I will
indeed perform my pleasure on them in my day when the rod to rule is given into
my hand of the Most High Lord."
young man was barbarously beaten in Singapore, a so-called act of justice. If now you would have executed the man that held the cane and
those who made that law and sanctioned it, I might be pressed to go a bit easier
on them in my day.
since you did not - I will reward them with blows just as they did to others.
For such law and such acts of inhumane cruelty are punishable by death.
Let this be a warning for all that contemplate cruelty, that I hate
cruelty, I despise it, and I will not leave it unpunished.
a man to be corrected by a whip is so designed to leave neither permanent harm
nor scars, when applied in the correct manner, namely with mercy.
But these butchers know neither bounds nor mercy; therefore I will be to
them as they were to their fellow man. This
they will have of me - as of the Lord, like as the Lord said; "You will lie
down in torment."
every single deed, and for every single word spoken, there will be a reward. Watch therefore O you foolish creatures what you speak and
how you act. For a rod of iron will
be given, and I will use it.
Lord said; He will reward mercy with mercy and torment with torment, so will He,
and so will I in His name, for accordingly He made me guardian of the whole
multitude of the gentile nations.
many Jews died for their sins; they suffered much on account of their wickedness
so that they might find mercy in a day to come.
Therefore were they given into the hands of their enemies, of late to the Germans.
the Germans took delight in having received the power to punish Israel, for
although Israel had done them no harm, yet they harmed Israel. Therefore now are
these guilty, because they accepted to punish a people that were no more sinful
should have refused to harm Israel, saying to the Lord Most High; Behold we are
as guilty of sins against Thee as they are, how then should we punish them or
take their lives? Behold O Lord
they are Thy people, as we are Thy creation; punish them by Thy own hand, for we
are guilty as they are.
they had this wisdom they would have spoken these words, and it would have
reckoned to them for wisdom. But
they were foolish, and blind, and ignorant, irrational animals that took it upon
themselves not only to execute what was laid open for them, but delighted in it.
they went far beyond with cruelties that cannot be expressed, for which there
are no words.
Rec 31 (Friday 1994, day of Passover)
day the Lord gave His life, a day the pagans call April 17, for them a Sabbath
(this year anyway). But none of
them celebrated it because they are blind and know not their right hand from
Rec 32 (What is in a word?)
of the survivors of the holocaust of WW2 remarked as he took hope for help, he
used to say "I look to the hills from whence my help comes."
surmised that he was quoting a part of Scriptures, but at the same time I
thought; "This is not possible, for no right knowledged person would have
said that, not David, nor the Lord, nor any writer of the Scriptures."
I presumed that he spoke it out of context, and I searched the psalms to see
where that was written. For so I
reasoned "You may indeed be looking to the hills, that your deliverance be
from the hills - as from the Lord over the hills.
But David would never write such words; he would not look to the hills.
person then spoke these words out of context for they are written in Psalm 121,
but with a question mark as in asking - shall I look to the hills for help?
It is a question on which an answer is to follow, as the psalmist (in
other words) said. No, not from the
hills, but from the Lord shall my help be.
then anyone will argue here, that perhaps this is what the person meant, that he
looked out for help from the Lord as the psalmist wrote it, the answer is
“no,” that person did not comprehend the verse, nor what the words entailed.
else he would not have said so, for he is not comparing men with God, but simply
looking out for help - be it of God, or of the hills. The evidence is clear, in
ignorance he quoted the psalmist out of context - not to his benefit.
while his sentiment contains a truth - it is not what he would have said had he
understood the nature of his words. So
it is that man sentences himself in his own ignorance, giving himself into the
hands of them that are not able to save.
that looks to the Lord does not pronounce saying; "I look to the hills from
whence my help comes," since it denounces God.
Rec 33 (A prayer 5-25-94)
Lord God, love of my soul, desire of my heart, how bitter indeed are the words
of the scroll within me. Though I
expect they shall be sweet in my mouth, I say again O Lord I have no stomach to
relate the affairs of the wicked, to reprove or to correct them for their evils.
to execute vengeance on them for the hurt done against Thy servant, for the
malice with which they struck out against me and my children.
my prayer O Lord, I pray Thee, let not my word be cast aside as were Thy servant
not accounted, to make a fool of me. But
O Lord touch them, reprove them for me, let my word be Thy word, and Thy word be
my word to which they have no counsel.
them for me that I may not be in their eyes as a fool, as one devoid of senses,
but rather that indeed I am Thy servant. When the righteous of old prayed to
Thee Thou did hear them, Thou did stop the sun and lengthen the day.
in the time of the sons of the Maccabees Thou did show Thyself to deliver Thy
servants. I now O Lord am not as
the sons of Thy firstborn, yet even a dog may eat from the crumbs of the table,
and receive its food from the hand of those seated on the table.
indeed I am only Gentile, not of the sons of Thy firstborn, yet my love is with
Thee, and my hope fixed on Thee only. I
have no turning but to Thee, and Thou did grant me Thy knowledge and filled me
with Thy truth.
If then they perpetrate robbery on me - so let it be, but let me speak justly for the cause of justice, and not give my honor for contempt.
My mind meditates many things O Lord.
And yes, why should I even speak to them to defend Thy law, or Thy
justice before them? For they
ignore Thy law as they ignore the cause of my justice, which is Thy justice.
long O Lord wilt Thou be silent and not avenge Thyself upon them?
For we also are bound up in Thy word, when they scorn Thy word - they
scorn me also. Let me not be timid
with them O Lord, but rather as a Lion ready to strike, at whose roaring the
creatures of the forest hide themselves.
Rec 34 (June 7-1994)
Lord I wish to show to the many righteous angels, and to the righteous men of
old, that one born in the eve of the world finds courage in Thy strength to
endure the pain and ridicule laid on him by his enemies.
while I came in the ending of the days, cast within a generation more apostate
then those before, that Thy grace has not diminished, but for all time is
able to draw men towards truth and righteousness.
do not wish to do less than those that went before me.
But as Eleazar in his old age stood up under his accusers - so may I, as
one who arrived in the old age of the world, show forth the glory of the Most
High, in dignity, and in purity, with wisdom, and virtue that are praised by all
who love the Most High Lord.
by the grace of the Most High who lighted the lamp of His law within me I shall
be found wise. And for His grace in
compassion and temperance, which I asked of Him - I shall be found a noble
all this is the fear of the Lord for those that take it to heart, and that give
themselves to His fear with all their might.
This strength is not of man, but in the Lord my God upon me.
Rec 35 (July 10-94 What is in a word)
you make an altar of stone, meaning; if you will serve Me,
- you shall not built
it out of cut stone, meaning; you shall not modify My word or
law. Nor wield your tool upon it, meaning; not to improve upon it,
not work your own cunning upon it, but to observe, to leave the word as I have
You shall not offer the sacrifice with leavened bread, meaning; not serve God
after your likens, not after a fashion more to your likens.
law is wisdom, it is justice and righteousness, it is all good things. Once I borrowed from a neighbor and repaid not giving
interest, for I desired that he might receive a blessing, as of a
brother from the Lord for his kindness.
Lord only is great, what man can rule a people, a king his multitude, what man
is to know every man? God only is
great; He alone is able to govern every man to his needs.
How shall I rule an endless multitude?
The Lord alone is ruler and governs forever, and His kings are in His
Rec 36 (An oracle of the Lord.)
is the Lord alone who shall be exalted. He
alone is God, He alone has understanding. We
all are like figs who lest we are eaten serve not for food. And lest we eat from the hand of Him who made us, how shall
knowledge come into us?
I speak words, words of understanding. Of
nations whose rivers divide the land, for its teachers teach what is not
knowledge, and so bring the people to division, to ignorance, and to
man has knowledge? Who among the
children of men has understanding? I
looked, and beheld they are a delusion, a people without sense.
I have no desire in them.
when I look on them my heart turns for compassion, I love them and yet again I
loathe them, I looked and behold they are my people, and yet again not my
and behold my blood will be poured out for them.
Although they are a people without knowledge yet will I pour myself out
for them, and while they knew me not I will acknowledge them.
oracle concerning Egypt, the greater Egypt, an Oracle regarding my people that
are not my people. I looked for
knowledge but saw none, so then - rivers will dry up, their teachers fail, all
of them hills and mountains, all of them rulers and chiefs will fall headlong.
For they are without knowledge, and their people without insight.
reached out to them, but they would not hear me for they are O Lord as Thou
said, "Nations whose rivers divide the land".
Therefore O Lord did I reject them even as they rejected me.
did I ask of Thee to grind them to powder, for they are a people without
knowledge, a people that cannot hear what is of profit for them.
stroke upon their backs until they know and have seen the reward of their folly.
Afterwards they shall hear, then knowledge shall enter into them.
Then will I take pleasure in them and joyfully call them, "My
people, my people".
Rec 37 (Dec 25 - 94)
soul is at peace, and my heart does not stumble for I trust in the Lord. When the wicked devised plans against me I had no fear of
them, for I walk in the knowledge of God, He gave me His counsel, a sure word to
is man unto me, the princes of the earth that I should fear them?
There is but One whose fear is in my heart, the Lord my God to perform
His precepts, to keep His word. His
law is a delight to me, His judgments my great joy, for the Lord decrees
righteousness and truth is He.
them that fear the Lord not tremble before the might of men, for as stubble
before the fire are all those that depart from God.
May my soul praise Thee at all times O Lord, may my heart extol Thy glory
in Thy wondrous works for I love Thee.
O you men, and do not forget the words I speak, for I love justice and I hate
iniquity, nor will I suffer injustice to abide, for I love righteousness and
perfect harmony. He appointed me a
multitude, and by His will I shall abide.
not to counsel me, nor that you should sway me O you children of men, for One is
my Counselor, and Him only I obey. I
do not require your vote nor your approval.
As for me I am full of compassion for you, for the whole number of you.
wise and rejoice in the living grain that is given me of my Father and of my
Lord. You shall find me a just
king, a lover of peace and of righteousness, one who will be beloved by his
Rec 38 (3-5-95)
foolish men, how do you think to be so familiar with the Almighty Lord? What are you the likes unto Him that you should compare
yourselves to Him? What are you
that you should seat yourself so near to Him?
are nothing while the Lord is inconceivable, His majesty is far above and beyond
all that man can conceive. We are
mere dust, men of little understanding, while the person of God can not be
described for His greatness.
do not know how a single blade of grass grows, while God perform these deeds
endlessly. Do not therefore rate
yourselves so familiar to the Almighty God, for you do not know Him.
Rec 39 (MK 95)
first day of the year, by Gentiles 4-2-95, a Sunday, while in fact it is the
Thursday of the week. Am I now the
one and only one this day among the five billion or so that are on this earth,
with such knowledge and understanding? He
indeed gave me understanding, He took pity on me and set me on high.
how I love Thee my God for Thou art God, Thou my love, my hope, my sure word. I love Thee because Thou wilt execute judgment and bring
justice in the earth, Thou wilt vindicate the cause of Thy servant and do right
to the upright.
how lovely Thou art to rise up and enter into judgment with the inhabitants of
the earth, and to put the wicked to the sword, to cleanse the earth from the
breath of the wicked.
is no justice but by Thee O Lord and no righteousness except by Thee alone, for
Thou art righteous, and justice is Thy honored word.
Therefore does Thy servant love Thee because by Thy word he will see the
desire of his soul, and truth with righteousness and justice in all the earth.
O Lord has made me a key to the nations. Thou
has bundled up the nations within me. Within
me the people of many tribes are heaped together like ears on a sheaf.
And like a tree with many branches so has Thou made me the trunk to bear
I were not as I have spoken - how would the nations live?
If the words of my mouth were untrue where would man be? Thou has made of me a deliverer of many.
soul is in Thy hand and in Thy grace did Thou form me.
Thou did call me a prince of righteousness saying; He shall be a king of
peace, and he shall find justice in the earth as his soul desires.
Rec 40 (A continued suit at law)
all you nations and you peoples; I have called for the day of judgment that I
may vindicate myself against the pursuits of the wicked, that I may slay them
and execute justice.
called for default, the case is no longer to
question my sins, but the
unfaithfulness of my enemies.
sins are hidden in the mercy of the Most High, but yours are open before the
eyes of the court, and thus you will be judged according to your wicked works.
see, and perceive you inhabitants of the earth, the Lord has worked a marvelous
thing, He has hidden my faults and granted me an arm to judge many peoples.
In righteousness I will judge and with flawless justice I will execute
formed me a key to many nations, when He looks on me He looks on you.
He made me a prince of many thoughts.
Rec 41 (April 14-95 by gentiles 4-16)
is the day of the preparation of Passover, but even Israel does not know the day
of the Lord at hand, they have all become foolish, and do not remember the
instructions of the Lord their God. O
my dear Israel soon you will come to understand, soon you will be redeemed, the
remnant of you, the chosen of the Lord.
I beheld the foolish among Gentiles, its preachers, and doctors of religion as
they call themselves, debating if Christ was indeed real.
"He came riding on a donkey into Jerusalem", so they said.
indeed He did, but you O you most foolish ones you do not comprehend, nor do you
realize that you, yes you, are the very ass-end of that donkey.
For He came riding high upon you O you blind ones.
This is the meaning of the donkey, to destroy you O you foolish donkeys.
Rec 42 (April 23-95)
you not heard O you shameless people how the Lord said; "I will send Nebuchadnez'zar
My servant, the king of Gentiles, and he will set his throne
above these stones"? If now
only you were able to hear the voice of the Lord, if only you were able to
Sun rises and the Sun sets, but what meaning does that hold?
O if you could only understand. The
fire burns westward, rising in the east and setting as it goes.
The Sun travels by day and by night, the token is before you, but who is
again from Jeremiah 43, "he shall kindle a fire in the temples", as in
all the churches, "and shall cleanse the land of Egypt as a shepherd cleans
his cloak from vermin". Even
so will I, for these things are a token. Hear
and understand, as Nebuchadnez'zar laid siege and received his reward, even so
43 (In Wisdom )
world without end, for the Lord is without end.
And how should it not be, for as light is born of Light - so the whole of
creation is God - as out of Him, the whole of creation being a birth of Him.
For as the Lord made in Himself a whole creation, an invisible creation,
a great and High creation not seen with the eyes of dust, nor such as can be
perceived with eyes.
in His marvelous being He formed a birth of the birth in Him, and it was equal
to fire, and from it He caused to come forth what to men appears as a universe,
the many galaxies with its many stars and planets,
then He made many divers creatures out of the
(by figure of speech) the dust of the lower worlds, and many years
passed. Then as the Lord had
purposed, and as such created from the very beginning, time came to be for man
to be made a living creature.
He set for man a period of a single week that on the eight day he might be
acceptable in His sight, the moist of his birth being cleansed from him
devil then learning how it was God’s intend to create another world, to put
another creature in charge of His creation of the lower things, he was wroth
since he already once sinned. And
why should this creature lower than himself receive a glory he could no longer
attain unto. Thus he set out to
destroy man along with himself.
Rec 44 (March 2-97)
head upon the right will consume the head upon the left.
What are the kings of the earth to me, or its princes? Its rulers and mighty men all together are like dross to me,
like the foam that floats on top, which I will discard so that the moist may
these officers and soldiers, servants and princes, who as they said, "just
followed orders," - these I will call to account, because they said,
"they just followed orders," Therefore they will bear their
Lord will reward you with pain and with regret for your deeds that were
criminal. And I will vanquish and
detain you for your pride and for your arrogance.
When your life before Him is annihilated I will exact justice upon you.
not think therefore that you will fare better than your judges, for I will exact
upon you the reward of the justice which you brought upon my people, and you
will grieve. You sentenced my
children for the smallest of things, while you justified true criminals, and
even set them free.
justice therefore stinks, it is no more than oppression and criminal. Therefore do not think you shall escape.
Consider how just as the Nazi’s did as they pleased, and at wars-end
retribution came unto them, so it will be for you, and for them.
no hiding-place, nor death shall conceal you.
Nor shall I judge as these judges did at the retribution, nor hold a
court as they held their court.
justice that will emanate from my throne will be swift, nor will you be able to
speak as these did before their court, for I will not hear none sensual speech.
But as it written in Heaven, inscribed by the angels, your whole record as
recorded by Enoch the Servant of the Lord.
record from birth to death written in the tablets of Heaven, by that record you
shall be judged.
Nor will I listen
to your pleas, nor accept your excuse, but as the lightning strikes swiftly,
even so will I trample on you because of your criminal deeds.
not how I will deal with each and everyone, with those who inflicted torture, as
compared to those who suffered torture. For
as I once said, "that as there are people in that pool of fire by number,
so equally as many plateau’s are there. Each
will receive according to their deeds and according to the words of their mouth.
am called a river, a river flowing into the great sea, and again I am called a
river of fire. Consider then O you
judges what these words may entail, for unto that end did He create me, for to
that end have I come into this world.
may not in this day comprehend me, nor the words that I speak, but in the day of
the tribunal you will understand perfectly. I am angry with you O you judges,
more with you than with the princes of the Earth.
that is not good for you, seeing how the Almighty Lord set me for a prince over
you. It is written. "An abomination is he who chooses you."
See therefore O you people how the Almighty Lord despises them that make
their choice for you, that
has their desire in you.
record stands O you judges and you princes. I did not choose you, neither did
I desire you, but I abhorred you and despised to be a ruler of you. I shall not be an abomination before the Lord my God.
righteousness is in the Lord, by His name I am called, in Him was I born and
came forth from His loins, therefore shall you that are angry with me be undone. All that are incensed against me will be put to shame, for
unto me will come a multitude of men out of number.
from you men will depart, and shun you as one shuns a plague.
I may appear to you as a dry tree, whose roots have been cut off, yet
will I rise and grow to a height above the trees of the forest, a cedar of a
noble stature, for the mouth of the Lord has spoken it.
Rec 45 (TRUTH)
A word, a meaning, a declaration, a realm, and one that along with
"justice” is least understood by men.
But why should I bother to speak of a truth when there are so few to know
the meaning? Yet I will speak of a
truth though the hearts of men are seared unto the hearing thereof.
will pay heed to my words when I speak of a truth, for the time is evil and the
world near its final end. But to
that end that I have come, nor will I attempt to conceal myself.
things I hate, and a third I loathe, when pride and conceit present itself, and
the filth of men with men and women with women in a way not according to the
creation thereof, these I loathe with all my being.
persons so I resolved, shall not enter before me, nor come near to my presence,
I shall despise them, and they shall be ashamed of what they were and come to
loathe themselves for their wicked ways and be ashamed before men, before all
who look upon them.
will be as a Lion upon princes and upon rulers to break their necks, and to
suffocate them, and upon judges and magistrates as a bear who casts his weight
on them to crush them. And who will
will not escape, nor will you have power against me.
There will be no place for you to hide, not for any of all the nations
that are given into my hand.
that which you imagine as being justice in this world, I say to you; is a far
cry from what Justice is and what it shall be.
What you call justice can-not be compared to the likes of what you will
see and behold as justice.
behold your oppressions as justice, and your lies as truth, but it will not be
so within my courts, and you will learn a whole new justice, one that is just
and righteous, one that rewards the guilty with guilt and that has mercy upon
will I act in haste seeing how all eternity’s are before me, to what end
therefore shall I make haste?
Rec 46 (In wisdom)
Wisdom", as a word to the wise and to the foolish that the one as the other
may be educated or fall by his own hatred.
is written; “He who says to the wicked- you are innocent will be cursed by the
peoples, abhorred by nations. Isn’t
this something you should have paid attention to you judges and you counselors,
you who claim yourselves immune from the inquisition of the law?
why should you wish to be cursed by the people, and abhorred by the nations? Did I not pronounce a judgment on you, on the whole number of
the judges from all nations for their inequities in judgment, and for their
disregard for justice, for which reason you caused me to be angry with you?
imagine as if my word will never come to pass, and that I vainly imagine the
authority of which I speak. But
what if you are wrong, and you find yourselves subject unto me, then what? Yea then you will tremble and your bravery will fly away from
Moreover you ask yourselves, who is this man to speak in this way to us? But do not attempt to know my mind you foolish man, for have you not heard how it was said;
“As the heavens is for height and the earth for depth so the mind of kings is un-searchable." But those who rebuke the wicked will have delight, and a good blessing will be upon them.
By justice a king gives stability to the land. And a righteous man knows the rights of the poor, but a wicked man does not understand such knowledge.
is no wisdom among you judges, you have done away with knowledge, and abased
understanding. How is it that
you have not considered how the beginning of wisdom is to get wisdom.
If anything is to be gotten O you judges it is this, to get
insight. Praise and prize her
therefore highly and she will exalt you.
spoke saying; “He that speaks evil against a brother or judges his brother,
speaks evil against the law, and judges the law.
How much more then shall not judges be in violation to be judges of the
law when they do not apply the law correctly upon a man?
In the day to come neither men nor women will have rights to vote, for there will be no voting. For as a master does not require the approval of his livestock, so neither do I, nor will I seek your input.
shall not gather gold or wealth to yourselves you that are greedy for gain, for
there will be no oppression and greed will be stamped out.
For even as he that is overpaid steals, so I will not allow wealth to be
affixed unto the dead.
unlike this world, shall your pride and your arrogance enter into my kingdom. You will not celebrate your stars nor your celebrities for I
will not raise the dung of men to heights
will not have your corporate conglomerates for my wealth shall not be yours, nor
my favor be upon bullies. You will not see millionaires playing your game, for I
will ordain sports for their sport and not for gain.
Nor will you pronounce filthy speech or I will fill your mouth with lye
and with tar
have the habit of blessing everyone, and to flatter. How then have you not heard
how it was said, that “it is not good to eat much honey."
So be sparing of complimentary words.
promise keepers, yes if only now they would indeed do so, and pay their women
equal pay, and not be like those who claim equal rights yet rob their women of
their pay. But to one who is hungry
everything bitter is sweet.
wisdom it is said, “Turn first your ear to the law to keep it before you pray,
lest your prayer be counted against you".
And that “He who increases his wealth with interest degrades himself
and his wealth will go to another".
now I say; What a marvelous thing the Lord has done in creating man and his
woman, to create the race of man and all his insets, to have made music and
sounds and love’s desire to swoon for life and sweet rejoicing
again I say; may this man Edward’s be accursed by every nation, let no nation
desire him in their midst. May he
wander from place to place for the cold-blooded premeditated murder that he
brought on man, to have invented a way to kill the embryo in the womb when it
has barely begun.
such persons who lack all regard for life may their dwelling be with the dead.
For while these Nazi murderers had yet some shame to attempt to hide
their murders, this man is proud of his murders and proclaims it openly.
Rec 47 (Sept 7 1997)
are a fool to seek to be a ruler, to desire this people, for
an abomination is he who desires them. You
are a fool to seek high office to govern the people, for it bears a grievous
are a fool to desire to be a judge, to judge this people, for it brings with it
a great torment upon you.
sentence one that was not guilty you the judge will bear the punishment of the
guilt and serve sevenfold because you pronounced guilt upon an innocent person.
if you let the guilty go free you the judge will bear his punishment.
For when you die and are consumed by the worms, you will not find your
name written in the book of life, and you will be cast into the pool of fire
that burns forever. There O you
foolish ones you will suffer for your ignorance and for your unbelief of my
Rec 48 (January 1998. To all people)
this O you people, and you that govern them, and listen all you ignorant ones,
and the babes, which you have for rulers. You
work with computer chips and with radio active materials making bombs of
the bombs are nothing to be feared, instead it is your ignorance that is
bringing you to destruction, and your pride is casting you into hell, into great
pains. What fools you are, you lack knowledge and are devoid of understanding?
it will be that the number of men yet alive upon the face of the earth will
become few, so that even a child can write down their number so the Lord said.
will a man do for his life, or the child of man for his well-being?
If only he had knowledge, if only he came to understanding, but they love
lies, and to create destruction and to cause oppression.
They are born of an evil seed, and so their inheritance will be evil.
for gain, and that with ignorance, O what a combination to bring a man into hell
and destruction and shame upon his wife and upon his children.
An evil seed that cannot be reconciled - so they are, therefore they must
this you foolish ones, you children of men, your preachers that vipers-breed cry
aloud saying; Christ Jesus, Christ Jesus, and they add the word salvation,
salvation to it. But what is it
that the Lord will do?
is this; The light of Israel, the Christ, will become a fire and His Holy One,
that Jesus of Nazareth will become a flame, And it will burn and devour his
thorns and briar in one day.
you hear it correctly O you foolish ones of the earth?
“In a single day” so He said. And
in that day the Lord said “He
will destroy both body and soul, yes both soul and body so He said.
then do you fear man or your miserable little toys, which you call your atom
bombs or your cruise missiles? These
things are nothing to be compared to His weight upon you.
His death and His resurrection will put all of you in the wrong, for with
His blood He bought you body and soul.
so He said; “He will make justice the line, and righteousness the plummet and
hail will sweep away the refuge of lies.”
oppression, O how you love oppression, for your own greed, and for your own
ignorance. you burned women at the
stake, and even to this day you banish them from husband and children blaming
them for your own stupidities, and for jealousy as if they were witches or
guilty of the death of one who died of natural causes.
now let me tell what their ultimate fate will be, and what yours will be. For I will have compassion on these outcast, on all the
oppressed ones. And I will embrace them, and feed them with joy and gladness.
will be an enclosure to them so that no harm shall strike them again, and no
foul ruler will ever come near to them. I
will guard them under the shade of my branches so that no-one will ever again
oppress them or practice their ignorance upon them.
as the multitude, which you in cold blood murder in the womb, and all the young
blood which you slay in your craving for greed and vain glory.
But it will not be so for you O you barbarians of the human race.
will rot in hell, and upon your cry for mercy we will not listen, because you
did not listen when these my little children cried to you for mercy.
therefore O you butchers, and you ignorant beasts that we will punish you, and
punish you severely, we will reward you sevenfold for your monstrous deeds
because your iniquity is great and without excuse.
For how will you call it simple ignorance when with evil intend you
embark upon your atrocities?
this my children if you are able to hear me, you the outcast and the oppressed -
do not bemoan your present condition so much for I will come quickly unto your
aid. Bear your moment of pain with
good spirits for soon the oppressor will be cut-off, and the rulers of the earth
will be ground to powder.
They will think to have a word before me, and even lift their heads to me, but as the lightning is swift to strike even so swift will I cut them down not ever to raise their heads again.
are the rulers of the earth to me that I should pay them attention or the
governors of men that I should turn my head for them.
They will indeed have their reward, which oppress you my little children.
not therefore O my beloved children my heritage of the Most High Lord, bear this
moment of pain and I will love you with an everlasting love.
indeed for having come forth into this world, knowing also that a Redeemer
awaits you. One who will bring
justice into the world, and who will punish all the guilty, and destroy the
wicked and the oppressor.
so the Lord my God said. “Behold,
a King will reign in righteousness, and princes will rule in justice.” Hear then how it will be O my children; He said: Each of
these princes will be like a hiding place from the wind, a covert from the
will I be to you my dear ones, “like
a stream of water in a dry place, and like the shade of a great rock in a weary
O my dear children your mouth will speak readily and you will learn
understanding from the mouth of understanding, and you will have good judgment
from the sons of the Most High God.
living waters shall enter into you and it shall be for healing, and you shall be
healed. I shall love you with
all my heart O my people my beloved of the Lord.
for you O you oppressors, you evil beasts, the Sun does not burn for nothing
where the elevation is low, and where it hovers directly over them to singe them
for their accursed boldness and for their pride.
will indeed reward you for your greed and for your insatiable thirst.
In the day when the rod of iron is placed into my hand then you will
understand these things, and you will come to know it perfectly.
Rec 49 (SEPT 1998)
am indignant with you people, with the rulers and the judges of man, and with
their counselors, an indignation that will come to their hurt.
A young man slapped another young man who was moving in on his
girlfriend, and for it the judge gave him a twenty five-year prison sentence.
now the sentence pronounced by the parents of that young man, who said, “A few
months would have been sufficient". They
spoke a right judgment. But now what will be done for that counselor, and the
prosecutor, and for the judge who performed the injustice?
the name of the Lord my God I will surely reward that counselor sevenfold for his
criminal act, and likewise for the judge. And
if they dare speak to me in opposition I will double their sentence.
For every hour that young man was confined, they will serve sevenfold,
and they will weep.
do not come to me saying, O but it is the law, we followed orders, and the rules
set for us. For I do not care about
your rules or your laws, none of your rules of injustice have regard by me.
But I will reward you according to the law of justice, according to a
righteous law, the law of the Most High Lord.
For his law alone you are to obey.
therefore you attempt to defend your rules of injustice I will surely multiply
the sentence upon you O you judges and you counselors.
Then you will know what justice is, when the rod of justice is assayed
And do not think that you shall go free, each and everyone of you who partook or consented to that injustice, because for your very thoughts you will be punished.
The clerk who filed the
orders, and the officers who took the man to prison, and the warden of the
prison, and the prison-guards, each and everyone will be rewarded for this
incident of injustice so I say to you in the name of Him who appointed me
guardian of the nations.
And so I repeat for those who followed the orders of the judge, and consented to the determination of the prosecutor. You should not have held the young man confined O you warden, you should have refused to confine him, saying;
I will not be an accessory to this injustice,
therefore I will hold him fourteen days and no longer, or else I will resign my
post. And likewise with the
prison-guards, and the officers of the court.
at the facts O you unwise creatures, for in partaking with the injustice, each
of you wrote your own death sentence, and brought a grievous reward upon
yourselves. If on the other hand
you would have refused to partake with the injustice, you would have gained your
life, and ward off God's punishment upon yourselves.
you would have shown and pronounced a righteous judgment to the judge, and to
the prosecutor, and all lawmakers involved.
In that way you would done justice in the earth, and testified to the
wicked that their deeds are wicked. And
for that you would seen a good reward.
therefore O you people what justice is, and how it will reward each and everyone
both good and evil. This I say to
you so that you may meditate upon it.
a judge orders an unjust judgment, and you follow up on it, you make yourself an
accessory to the same; even to file the papers makes you guilty of the same vile
act. It is better to quit your job
than to lose your life, and better to resign than to suffer great pains in hell.
Rec 50 (September 27-1998)
how I spoke but
a few words of reproof, righteous words for correction.
But they took it as were it malice, as if a bomb were dropped on them.
It touched a sore spot; it was the truth therefore were they angry and
so they increased their lies against me, and in their false imagination ran up
charges against me. The Lord rebuke
them for their anger, and their false imaginations against me.
Rec 51 (Oct 9-98)
I should have been wiser, but I am not wise, and so I despise myself, and am wroth with myself, for I should have been wiser, but I am not wise.