RESTORATION  OF  ISRAEL

   CHAPTER 69       LINK TO OTHER PAGES

  1. How beautiful are the feet of him who brings good news, who testifies of you O Israel, and of Judah the restoration of the both of you. You are His people, the people of the Lord, and you are my love, and my adoration to embrace into forever.

  2. I look forward to the day that it will be said; "She is yours." When for a first time I will kiss your lips, and hold you to me forever and ever.  A prophecy yes, and so I have spoken in the knowledge and the wisdom which the Lord, the God of Israel in His great love has given me.

  3. For a day to come, so it will be because He has loved you, and loved me for you that together we may rejoice in His love forever and ever. Nor will there be an end to the number of our children, the many subject unto us. Also a day in which I will embrace the ruler of Israel, its king into forever.

  4. The book Of Jeremiah, chapter 33, and 31:31-40 for a "new" covenant that He will establish with you O my very dear Israel. A whole new covenant as in this very day He, the God of Jacob, did with me.  

  5. For how else by verse 37 would there be a restoration of you had it not been for "His" revelation unto me to know the foundations upon which the earth rests?

  6. Hear now O my very dear Israel, your restoration is near, it's the eve of the sixth day, the Sabbath is near at hand.  But there are those among you that presume that the Son of David will come once you have established yourself both physically and spiritually.

  7. But do not believe them for they are telling you a lie, the deceit of their own imagination, not the word of the Lord the Messiah.  You think perhaps that you are in fact established, now that you are a nation again, and that you will remain so?  

  8. But do not flatter yourselves with vain conceptions, for the Lord said unto you how; "Zion shall be redeemed by justice, and those in her that repent by righteousness. "

  9. Moreover He said; "That rebels and sinners shall be destroyed together, and those that forsake the Lord shall be consumed."  The Lord your Messiah is coming with a refiners rod to root out the wicked from among you before He will deliver them that remain. And as I behold you near and far where may these be found that have humbled themselves?

  10. Is it not written:  "The Lord will roar from on high, and from his holy habitation utter his voice; he will roar mightily against his fold, and shout, like those who tread grapes, against all the inhabitants of the earth."   

  11. Indeed it is written.  Do not therefore skimp over where He said; "Against His fold."  For that means you O Israel.  Therefore also I speak as I speak to you or to anyone else.

  12. Twice before the Lord humbled you so you might know His power and fear before Him, but you took no learning.  First He exiled you for a space of seventy periods, causing you to dwell among the Babylonians that you might teach them the righteous acts of the Lord, and Jerusalem enjoyed its sabbaths, its rest which you defiled upon her.

  13. Then having returned, and you became wicked again, He choose a day of festival when most of the nation was packed into Jerusalem, and the Lord surrounded them with the Roman armies, and took away from them both staff and water, pouring upon them His wrath for the many unspeakable crimes they had committed against Him.

  14. You have the record as to how terrible that was upon them, upon your forebears, and few escaped to again dwell among the Gentiles. And even upon these the Lord caused His sword to follow them, to punish them for their inequities.  

  15. And at last having given you into the hands of the German butchers to root you out of the earth, not many survived. Yet for these few He furnished them with a blessing to again return unto the land of their heritage as it is this day.

  16. But all these records of old, even of yesterday have taught you very little. I could quote you the words of the Lord by His prophets one after the other as to what you should do, and not do, with all its implications, words which you yourselves have, and are so proud of, yet few if any of you take them to heart.

  17. You do not seem to recall any of the good things spoken to you of the Lord to keep yourselves by them, but the vile things which you learned from the Gentiles these things you keep close to heart.  

  18. The Gentiles in their wickedness thought to remove the Messiah from resting upon your heads, by causing you to wear a devils hat, and that also turned into as you call it, a kippah upon your heads.

  19. This was so to denounce any Messiah upon you, as had He never come to have given His life for you.  This had its start some six to seven centuries ago.  It were the very servants of the devil falsely claiming the name of Christ upon themselves, as if the Christ rested only upon their heads and not yours, therefore these coverings were forced upon you.

  20. It was to renounce the Messiah from you, and to shame you, to render you as something sub-human, or like the German's of late to behold you as no more than rats. These so called Christians thought to take your glory upon themselves, even the thousand year reign - that is to be yours - they thought to take to themselves.

  21. That pope now in Rome - as you should very well know - is in fact and in deed a captain of that devil hating and despising every Christian, and that with a passion, wherefore also he wears that honor of the devil upon his head - since on this earth he is a chief captain of that devil, and bound to wear the emblems of the devil.

  22. He is the one with his confederates that murdered so many Jews and Christians throughout the years and centuries, under the facade as were they Christians.   

  23. Him and his confederates are against anything and everything that is in honor and respect to God and Christ, therefore they put on that ridiculous dress, and mumble with beads, and kneel to graven images.

  24. And some of these serpents are with you in Jerusalem this very day, and even owning part of it, which you allow in the ignorance of your heart.  But then - if like you say - my dear Israel, you are not in league with these devil worshippers, - why are you still toting that emblem of the devil upon you?  

  25. Are you not therefore still deceived by these devil worshippers, these so called Christians, and in their power? Are you not then of yourselves claiming to be sub-human, with no Messiah upon you? Are you not in fact admitting yourselves to be like unto them?

  26. Is it not a simple fact of nature and of respect for a man to remove his head covering when entering into a man's house, and when sitting down to eat, or when in prayer to God?  

  27. Of course it is, yet you conduct yourselves in direct violation of not only the command of God - but to nature itself as well, acting as though you were raised with no upbringing, as were you indeed like unto rats, like unto what the Germans held you to be.

  28. Even general Patton, though he was a Prima Dona, seeking but his own glory, removed his head gear, his helmet when he prayed to the Lord to restrain the weather for him, and the Lord granted him his request.   

  29. Is this not a lesson for you? Yet for that priest, that hypocrite, which wrote the prayer, there is no redeeming grace. Though Patton may have decorated him, it was none but a curse upon him.

  30. You have no conception O Israel how much the Lord God hates this vile disrespect you have of Him, and many of these so sated will not live to see the day of deliverance, but like the former holocaust so another holocaust is coming upon you.

  31. A selective holocaust from the hand of God to eradicate all the rebels, and the ungrateful and disrespectful from among you.

  32. It now is so that; criminals always accuse their opponents of their own crime.  In every way the devil attempts to reverse things.  The Germans used to say that they fought for a free Europe, while they labored to enslave it.  

  33. The so called Christians always persecuted and murdered Jews and Christians alike with the lie - that they were the Christians, in their stupidity as were they doing a service to God, just like you O Israel thinking to reverence God with your headgear while in fact you are mocking Him. You like these others also are twisting things around.

  34. Always twisting things around.  While then it is common in nature to remove ones head covering as a token of respect, the devil by its serpent young taught not only the muslims and the roman apostates, but Israelites as well to maliciously do exactly the opposite of what is of due respect to God, taunting against Him.  Like tiny ants boasting against a foot about to crush them.

  35. If O Israel, you indeed hate those so called Christians which persecuted your forebears, why then are you still putting on that ridiculous skullcap that the very captain of the devil, that pope in Rome wears as his insignia to the devil?

  36. The German devils wrote at the entrance to their death-camps; "Work makes free," while of course they meant to work them to death.  Always twisting things to hide the truth.  

  37. And so you as Israelites are in fact no different than these Germans.  Seeing you are claiming your covering as were it in respect, while in fact it is in "disrespect." If you are so pleased to wear these devil's emblems on your head, why not wear a swastika as well, which has also become a mark of evil and of death.  Or that yellow star to mark you for cowards?

  38. We know why you wear that devils emblem, it is to make you look different from the Christians, different from Christ Jesus, to scorn the Lord, and to mock the Father of all creation. In all your ways you mock the Deliverer of Israel, and why then do you seek life you hypocrites?

  39. The thousand year reign is of course for Israel as it has been prophesied for thousands of years.  And so here come the Germans thinking that if they rid themselves of all the Jews, they would have the thousand year reign for themselves.  Always twisting things around as if they could make it work.

  40. Their irrational attempt however  in World War Two did of course not even last for a week of years.  For whom do they think they are, as minute creatures, less than the dust on the scale, to boast themselves against Him who made the whole of the universe by the power of His word alone?

  41. But just like those foolish Germans that found themselves defeated, even so Israel will find itself defeated in all their irreverence to God and Christ the Messiah.  And so the Lord spoke:  "Zion will be redeemed by Justice, and those in her who repent by righteousness."

  42. But why O my dear Israel do I have to reprove you in this way, why are you forcing me to speak such words to you?  Rid yourself of the devil and of that emblem of him upon your heads, and let the Son of David, the Messiah be upon your heads, for it is He to deliver you, and not the devil.

  43. Let the Messiah be upon your heads, and Him only as a token to all - that you honor Him - even as he clearly told you, to uncover your head before Him as a sign of respect for Him, and for all that He grants you.

  44. Did not the Lord say;  "O My people, your leaders mislead you and confuse the course of your path."  It are your teachers, your so called rabbi's that are teaching you the desires of the devil upon you.  

  45. They don't want to be known as "Anointed" of God, other than in hypocrisy, therefore are they teaching you the desires of the devil since they proceeded from him.

  46. The Lord Himself said;  "You shall be ashamed of the oaks in which you delighted; and you shall blush for the gardens which you have chosen."  So then my beloved, be ashamed of them, for the oaks in which you delight are your leaders and your rabbi's.  Therefore blush for the vileness which you have placed upon your heads, your gardens are vile.

  47. You my dear Israel cannot possibly know how very much I love you, and how much I wish for you to dwell with me in everlasting delight, to live with joy and gladness into forever.  

  48. In my deep astonishing love for you I weep - for I am hurt deeply by all your backsliding.  It was told unto you, O yes it was told, and this is what He said;

  49. "Jerusalem has stumbled, Judah has fallen; because their speech and their deeds are against the Lord, defying His glorious presence. Their partiality witnesses against them; they proclaim their sin like Sodom, (Toting skullcaps)  they do not hide it.  Woe to them! For they have brought evil upon themselves."

  50. Your restoration for which you look so earnestly, how will it be?  Thus said the Lord;  "Tell the righteous that it shall be well with them, for they shall eat the fruit of their deeds, but woe to the wicked!  It shall be ill with him, for what his hands have done shall be done to him."

  51. I could go on and on to quote to you what has been said, but will it be of any value to you O my dear Israel?  My people, so spoke the Lord. "Children are their oppressors, and women rule over them.  O My people your leaders mislead you and confuse the course of your paths."

  52. Read it again and again if you must that it might factually enter in to you how it are your teachers and leaders that serve to your destruction.  Believe the Lord and Him only to the end that you might live and be delivered.  

  53. There was One whom your forebears nailed upon a cross just outside of Jerusalem, it was some time ago, that part of history is no lie like some of those that are liars among you wish you to believe it is.

  54. So then it was foretold quote; "There shall come forth a shoot from the stump of Jesse, and a branch shall grow out of his roots.   And the Spirit of the Lord shall rest upon Him, the spirit of wisdom and understanding, the spirit of counsel and might, the spirit of knowledge and the fear of the Lord.

  55. And His delight shall be in the fear of the Lord. He shall not judge by what His eyes sees, or decide by what His ears hears;  but with righteousness He shall judge the poor, and decide with equity for the meek of the earth.

  56. And He shall smite the earth with the rod of His mouth, and with the breath of His lips He shall slay the wicked."

  57. Okay now, you have read, but have you truly read what was stated? How in returning He would - smite the earth with the rod of His mouth?  "Righteousness shall be the girdle of His waist, and faithfulness the girdle of His loins."  So it further reads.  

  58. It means that if you turn from your wicked ways you will be delivered, while each and everyone of you that refuse to hear me, even me, will be slain.

  59. It are not only the Gentiles that will be cut down where they stand, but all the wicked and rebels among you O Israel as well. And I can tell you by whom, since the Lord proclaimed to send those of the north and of the east to slay you.  

  60. Yes I know you look for a restoration, to enter into the blessed Sabbath, hear then what the Spirit of the Lord spoke as written in the book of Proverbs.

  61.  "Give heed to my reproof; behold, I will pour out my thoughts to you; I will make my words known to you. Because I have called and you refused to listen, have stretched out My hand, and no one has heeded, and you have ignored all My counsel and would have none of My reproof.

  62. (Therefore) I also will laugh at your calamity; I will mock when panic strikes you, when panic strikes you like a storm, and your calamity comes like a whirlwind, when distress and anguish come upon you."

  63. When the German butchers were gassing your countrymen to death at those camps in Poland, the Lord did not reach out to save them but rather like He said, He laughed at their calamity, and did not intervene. 

  64. And this was because, all their days of their miserable life they mocked the God of Jacob, taunting Him with their headgear, and in every other way refusing to obey His statutes.

  65. Why do you think the English and the Americans failed to send bombers to eradicate these camps? It was because the Lord hardened their hearts against you, to the end that His wrath might come upon you, and not find help to yourselves.  

  66. Nothing at all went wrong in those days, but it proceeded just as the Lord had planned and ordained it.

  67. And so it reads further:  "Then they will call upon me, but I will not answer; they will seek me diligently but will not find Me.  

  68. Because they hated knowledge and did not choose the fear of the Lord, would have none of my counsel, and despised all my reproof, therefore they shall eat the fruit of their way and be sated with their own devices."  Therefore that Holocaust. 

  69. The word - "diligently,"  to seek Him diligently, - is that what you are doing O Israel in calling yourselves Messianic?  And how diligent are you?  For the Lord followed up on that word by saying; "but will not find Me."  How ever much therefore you labor to find Him, He said; that He will not be found of you, wherefore indeed you labor in vain. 

  70. The remainder of the sentence defines as to how and why you labor in vain.  And it was therefore O Israel, during that holocaust - that with all their prayers the Lord gave no answer, because for all their desire to live and be free of these German butchers, they failed to obtain knowledge, the knowledge that would have kept them secure, namely the knowledge of the Lord.

  71. For thus spoke the Spirit of the Almighty Lord:  "For the simple are killed by their turning away, and the complacence of fools destroys them;  but he who listens to Me will dwell secure and will be at ease, without dread of evil."  

  72. How much more now shall I say to you my very dear Israel?  How often do I have to repeat what is for life unto you? You will indeed be established, He will deliver the remnant of His people, and these He will make the crown of all nations.  

  73. Therefore if you wish to be among them, do not rebel against any of the words that I speak to you, for so by the Almighty Lord I swear to you - my word is His word, even as I am His, and sent by Him whom is your Messiah.

  74. As for me, I will take my stand to watch, and look to see what the Lord will say to me, and what He will answer concerning my complaint.  And so - the Lord answering said: 

  75. "Write the vision; make it plain upon tablets, so he may run who reads it.  For the vision awaits its time; it hastens to the end -- it will not lie.   If it seems slow, wait for it, it will surely come, it will not delay.  Behold; he whose soul is not upright in him shall fail, but the righteous shall live by his faith."

  76. I wonder if you will even read my words, if at all you will listen to me, that is to say, if at all you will listen to the words of the God of Jacob, the words that are for your life and well-being.

  77. I am keeping tabs at what the nations in their ignorance are mumbling regarding your demise, and how you react to these foolish skeletons twice dead and already in their grave. For to me looking ahead they are as good as dead already, and even this day no more than skeletons.  

  78. And for all their speech and actions they are no more than babes, foolish babes, with no knowledge of that which is about to strike them.

  79. For all their dealings and investigation, or declarations, none of their aspirations will come to take hold, for they are like the blind with no eyes to see nor hearts to contemplate.  

  80. They cause me to do no more than to shake my head over them, for their childish aspirations, knowing that before long when the hour of the Lord has come, it will be quite different for them.

  81. Behold O Israel, I have spoken on a day before it comes to pass so you may know that it is of a truth that I have spoken.

FROM THE RISING OF THE SUN.  

(ISAIAH 41: 25-29)

  1. Since the day that I was twenty and four years of age the Lord began to teach me the secrets to His creation, and revealing to me such many secrets of the things that are, and what will be in time to come?

  2. It is not possible for men to know all that the Lord has taught me, since much of it are guarded secrets to be understood by the wise only, for them only unto whom the Lord chooses to reveal Himself in these things.  

  3. How therefore I weep for man that such beauty is not in their taking, and how little I may reveal of that which was imparted unto me.

  4. But I was to speak of Isaiah in what he wrote in these verses, how a man was to be stirred up from the North. That man then was in his youth when he was stirred.  And where it reads; "That he had come, as in past tense, it can also be said as; "And he shall come from the rising of the Sun."

  5. Or better yet that; "He has come from the rising Sun," with no comma after the word "come." For so it may signify; "That he 'did' come from the rising Sun."  And since he came from the rising of the Sun, it is obvious that he would call upon the name of the Lord.   These words I mention for you that are wise, for them that are not without understanding.

  6. Then we will skip to verse 26, to the words; "From the beginning," and; "beforetime."  It are these words on which I wish to place emphasis.  For the time is now, and the before is when I was yet young.  And also the words; "from the beginning," since that beginning was when the Lord began to teach me.

  7. How was it that somewhere I said; "I was not taught of man, no man was my teacher?" My learning was not from books, nor from the lips of any creature, but the Creator of all taught me, and Him alone, to Him alone belongs the honor, and the glory.  

  8. And while one of the Israelites, Fred Stern, for eight years my employer, at one time wrote to the officials saying; "He teaches everything himself."  He was incorrect, although it may have seemed so to him.

  9. It is a question to say; "Who declared it from the beginning," and in before its time that it came to be known, so that we (as the people) might muse within themselves wondering if he be right or wrong.  

  10. The word; "Who," defines a single person, which is followed by a certain knowledge of him, that then comes with a question mark if that person might be right?"

  11. If then we read that sentence again up to the question mark; the question as such makes this statement; -- that someone had been speaking of, and/or declaring words, or a knowledge, in some time period before it came to be publicly known.  

  12. Or, it can equally state; -- that he is pronouncing a knowledge that has never at any time had been heard before.  Something altogether new and unheard of throughout all the days of man, for which cause, the world of men now hearing these things, do not quite know what to think of it.

  13. And the fact that these are musing in themselves wondering if he be right, is because; it is new, and they are unable to prove or disprove it. This is so since things sink slowly into man, him in general being of a small mind and wishing confirmation to all that appears new.

  14. But man is also prone to pride and to arrogance, as I duly discovered, that when something totally unknown is pronounced, there are always those coming out of the woodwork, as if they knew it all along.  Conceit, is the proper word for that, and it is found with them of little or no understanding.

  15. The Lord however is putting a spoke in their wheel certifying to all mankind - that it was never at all heard before, not spoken by anyone, and that moreover, none of them heard these words, as "my" words. This was so since the Lord follows to say; -- that it was He - as a first - to declare it to him.

  16. This the Lord spoke to make it crystal clear to all mankind that this new and unheard of knowledge and/or wisdom did not originate from any man, nor even from that single person, but that the Lord taught him, revealing it to him, whereby no man could possibly say - that he knew it of himself.

  17. Or that if any man was so unwise to say that it was known or heard before by any other person, he would be found a liar, and detestable in the sight of God, by having opposed his own Creator making Him out to have lied.

  18. And what is that knowledge and wisdom which the Lord did declare, that never as yet was heard or spoken before?  It is this my friends, the knowledge to the foundations of the earth, and of the fundamentals of the sciences.  As well as some revelations and prophecies that He granted me to pronounce.

  19. As then I have spoken of many other things as well, such as were heard before, and/or were common knowledge, I indulged into many things like a spring of water gushing forth out of compassion to try for the souls of man that they might be saved, and not die the death of a thousand deaths.

  20. For like it was said; "Bring knowledge into them, for in so doing you will make them alive."  So it is that I indulged in many words, and attempted to be as convincing as I could be, to not only reveal, but to teach for a learning along with it.

  21. As therefore I began saying that the Lord began to teach me when I was at the age of twenty and four, that is now coming to fifty years ago -- in the time factor of which all these none heard of words were recorded.  For by these words of the prophet Isaiah it was to be that way.

  22. Namely; a knowledge in coming with no one to hear or pay attention, except in the very ending. For is it not according to logic, in where it reads; "That we may say - he is right?"  That it had to come to a point where it would be heard, or was heard, or how else is that to be interpreted?

  23. As then the Lord by this very same person whom He taught all these things is making this gift to Jerusalem, to grant them a herald of good tidings, it is for the benefit of the whole world, since that serves as confirmation that he who is pronouncing those good tidings to Jerusalem, is also him who was taught as a son in Zion.

  24. If then the term Zion is not understood, it refers to the Lord in Israel, to Christ Jesus.  Zion as such is the church of God, His elect written in the book of the living.  Zion are those that are born of God, that keep His commandments to an everlasting joy.  Zion is also the word of God, the meaning of which being -- Holy.

  25. Never at any time from my youth onward did I speak in secret, nor at any time did I withhold His wisdom from the children of man.  But they would not hear me, it was a knowledge too great and too deep, and too new to apprehend.

  26. And even I am astounded at the knowledge and perception that the Lord has granted me, even I marvel at it. And like Paul with a thorn in his side, so as not to be over elated, I have had to bear a thorn, lest I should be over elated for the many secrets revealed unto me.

  27. Yet then again I weep, and I am sad for the sons of man how little they know, and how foolish their aspirations are - that after having read - they have yet the gall to muse saying; "We can not tell whether he be right or wrong."

  28. Does it have to be driven into them with a sledge hammer?  Is there no common sense, nor the integrity within them to acknowledge the right when it is placed within the palm of their hand?  Is it any wonder that I weep for man, and for his ability, how little his aspirations are for truth and common sense reasoning?

  29. Do not these words "That we may say; "He is right," put man down for brutes, for a creature of little understanding, and of little integrity?  

  30. For yes I consider it a lack of integrity to act in that manner, and not stand up forthright.  For when a truth is presented - why do you waiver, why do you even question it, when there is nothing to question?

  31. What am I to think of the race of man when they act in that way, to muse at my word saying; "We can't tell if he be right."? My estimation of the race of man suffers greatly when these act in that way, and I am reminded of that word; "in sevenfold," when I know it is not so in me, but for a sevenfold in the ignorance in man.

  32. And the Lord not only acclaims it for ignorance, but labels the sons of men as a delusion, as recorded in verses 28 and 29.  For I did approach them, I did speak to them, and many of them did read, and heard what was said, yet none of them had the integrity, nor the common sense to answer, nor reply, yet they would scorn and blacklist me.

  33. If then these reason in themselves that they were merely ignoring a man, O how blind indeed not to comprehend the nature of the words that were recorded for them.  Priceless jewels is what was placed before them, utterly priceless.  But how are the blind to apprehend the beauty of such jewels?

  34. As then the Lord spoke of that same person for a herald of good tidings to Jerusalem, it will not be so for the strong, and the rulers of the earth.  For it is indeed in me to trample upon these temporary one time rulers, that know not how to rule, or make for a repose.

  35. And since it is not fit that one of lower authority should judge one of higher authority, therefore also is he called a prince, a star of all the Gentiles.  And even then my judgment is not mine, but of Him who has send me.

  36. Frankly, I am not interested in the advice of any man, nor their counsel, since the whole lot of them showed themselves to me, as to God, nothing more than a delusion.  God only is my counsel.  And what is man to me that I should seek him out? 

  37. And so I have once again expounded a few words written for the sons of man - if they will take it to heart and be educated.

Thinking out loud

  1. Having come as a ruler into this world what man would possibly believe me?  Even the very Son of God when He came was not wanted nor believed. He came to denounce all rulers, how then would He be acceptable unto them? 

  2. My words and my entry are not those of a son of man, wherefore I am altogether strange, and no man, as they see it would in his right mind pay attention to me.

  3. Wherefore if I am to be - I must strike them with a rod by which to cause hem to hear.   For unless their ears are cut, and a rod of iron descends upon their backs they will not have any knowledge of my entry into this world, nor will they listen.

  4. Men will cause me to hear how I assume too much authority upon myself, and come to compare myself with Paul, who in all things held himself a servant.  Nor did he turn his hand against the rulers, nor to reprove the wicked in the earth, but He called to all men for the salvation of their souls. 

  5. I on the other hand do not appear as any preacher, nor as an evangelist that concern themselves only for the soul of man without reproving them - lest they would turn away from them in which case their bellies would not be fed.

  6. Paul said; "We write you nothing but what you can read and understand." While this man, meaning me, speaks of many things that have never been heard before, and avails himself of many riddles. How then are we to place our compliance upon him when he speaks in such terms unnatural to the ears of men?  

  7. He is not anything like the teachers of man, nor does he speak like unto them, he is of a different breed unknown to us, how then does he expect to enter in by us, that we should pay attention at his word? 

  8. For we have the Scriptures and the example of those which were send by God, nor therefore is he like unto them that we may consider him send of God.

  9.   Very well my dear ignorant ones, you cannot possibly know the love that I have for you, nor with what tenderness I apply the rod upon your backs, for if it were not for you my ignorant ones to what end would I be? 

  10. And yes to what end am I? I feel myself an outcast, and looking at myself I call it ludicrous for man to accept me for what it shows to them.

  11. Does anyone presume that for my speech I am too elated for the great number of the mysteries that were revealed to me?  Shall I search myself if indeed I am elated, like as Paul said, for which the Lord allowed the Satan to be for a thorn in his flesh showing that in the weakness of man God is greater?   

  12. And so I am searching myself if per chance I am elated.  But I am unable find it in myself.  Yet this I said to myself on occasions - regarding the knowledge given me:  "Awesome so I said, and again awesome."  But that however was by comparison to the knowledge of the sons of men that I came to speak that way.

  13. It has been near fifty years since such revelations were first awarded me, ample time to get used to them.  And with no man to reply nor provide counsel how am I to be elated for being looked upon as a fool, as one of no consequence?  

  14. By now all these many revelations have become as natural within me.  But even more so a remedy was awarded me, namely the effect of wisdom, for it is by her that humility comes to its perfection.  

  15. My request in receipt of all these many revelations was that at all times I might be humble, and to have exceedingly great love and compassion, so that in all things I might be for an image after Him from whom I came, and of what is to come, and what will be.  How those sanctified of the Lord will be a humble people, not priding themselves in the gifts awarded them.

  16. If now you will not believe me, believe the report concerning me, ask of them that have known me if at any time I boasted, or even spoke to them of the grandeur of the knowledge given me. They will answer you saying;  "We never knew it of him, he never spoke of it."

  17. Nor have I been without a thorn in my flesh, and I had my many arguments with the Satan. I am not like Paul, he was the apostle to all the Gentiles, while I am but a lion, a king of beasts, one to eat from the crumbs that fall from the table. 

  18. Paul had his testimony to place before the world, even as I have mine. Paul came for the elect to bring their souls to salvation, while I direct my speech to the wicked to reprove them, and to unbraid them for their wickedness. 

  19. It is this body of mine that is like a thorn in my side wounding me.  May the Lord take it and grind it to powder that my soul may fly unto Him from whom it came. What pleasure do I have in this body when to me it is a vexation, a bleeding wound upon my soul?

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